A lady came to see me for hypnosis – she said she had money problems.

Her husband had died several years earlier and she was having a problem with the business losing money since she had taken over after his death.

She cried to me saying that she was broke – all the while sat there carrying a Hermes Birkin, wearing Chanel and more diamonds than I had ever seen on one person.  Her chauffeur sat waiting for her outside in her pristine vintage Daimler.

She did not “appear” to me to be a lady who was broke but in her perception she was.

She had been to numerous healers before coming to me and nobody had been able to help her.

She had chosen me because she admired Marisa Peer and saw that I was trained in her RTT (Rapid Transformational Therapy).

We got to work to find the root cause of the problem.

Not surprisingly it wasn’t about money at all!

It was about her inability to be seen as the head of her Company. She had visibility issues. She was scared to be seen. She didn’t feel safe in a public-facing role — and that went all the way back to things she had experienced in childhood.

The reality of this is that because she wasn’t willing to lead her Company or make any decisions, it was quietly declining – making less money and therefore she thought this was a money problem.

With the truth of the problem now uncovered, I prepared her self-hypnosis audio that she would listen to, to rapidly reprogramme her subconscious mind to know that she was safe to be seen and that she was capable and able to make the right decisions for the Company.

When she came out of hypnosis she said she was very happy with what we had explored and felt that it was very useful to have the recording that I had prepared.

She left with a big smile on her face and I thought everything was good.

The next day she called me and she was very angry.

She wanted to know where the rest of her recording was.

I was confused and checked the recording I had sent her but all was good… it was a very powerful bespoke subconscious reprogramming audio.

I explained to her again how the subconscious mind works but she interrupted me saying that she knew all that… and what she wanted was the recording of the part of our session where she was crying and telling me what had happened to her (in great detail I might add!).

She told me that THAT is the part that she wanted to listen to over and over again.

I asked her why and her answer stopped me in my tracks.

She said that she never wanted to forget what was done to her and how it had affected the rest of her life.

We talked about why she wanted to never forget…

We talked about the idea being to reprogramme her mind for success so that she could move forwards…

But no – that wasn’t what she wanted! She wanted to hear it all again and again so that she could repeat it and never forget why her life is so hard…

And…. Why it is now connected with her business losing money because she was “simply too wounded to take on that role” and how she blamed her husband for dying, because now it was her duty and she didn’t want to do it.

I gotta say that I was slightly lost for words for a moment there… (yep – very unlike me I know!)

Most –actually all – of my clients come to me to heal so that they can move forwards but this was a lady who had come to me so that she would never forget and could NOT move forwards.

She genuinely wanted to stay in her wound and whilst I didn’t say this to her directly, she was actively choosing to stay in the role of victim in her own life.  Forever stuck in the story of what was done to her.

She came to me with supposed money issues but she was actively sabotaging herself… she was in victim… she was in blame… and she was even blaming me for doing something that could potentially move her forwards!

This was a very interesting case….

I learned a lot from her.

I saw how some people LOVE to stay in what they perceive to be a helpless situation.  She kept saying that there was nothing she could do to move beyond the story of what had happened to her.

But there was – there is – and that is true for all of us.

It doesn’t necessarily happen on its own though.  We have to choose it.

We have to choose to call our power back from the past – the things that happened to us, or didn’t happen to us – and we have to choose to write the ending of our own story.

Will it be one in which we stay powerless in our own life – or will it be one in which we override our past and succeed in moving beyond our wounds and trauma.

Here’s what I know after doing this work for a really long time now – when we drag the painful stories of our past through our daily life, it is like dragging a dead weight behind us… so it’s no wonder life feels heavy. No wonder we suffer – emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, and even physically.

We can’t change the past – but it does not have to be our future.

Now this lady’s situation was hard to miss really… she was literally requesting a recording of her own pain so that she could never forget!

But most of the time these loops that keep us stuck are far less visible than that.

Most of us aren’t asking to replay our suffering out loud – we’re just doing it quietly. In the story we tell about why we can’t do certain things, why we can’t move forwards yet, why we’re not ready yet… . In that way we keep ourselves just small enough to feel safe – because anything different or beyond our comfort zone is too much.  The story may be conscious but the limitation underneath it rarely is. Either way though the loop is the same. We’d rather stay small than grow. We’d rather stay in pain than risk change.

If you’ve been in this loop – or if you suspect you have – then the question is: are you ready to let go of your past and move into your future?

If you recognise yourself somewhere in this, even just a little perhaps… that’s no accident.  That is the part of you that is ready for change. So give me a call and let’s talk about how I can help you.